On Anger

If we are to be truly honest with ourselves about our feelings, we must admit how selfish they are.

Especially anger.

While we might believe anger can serve a cause for good, most times it's not; it's for us.

Oddly, anger is one of those selfish feelings that does more harm to us than others - depending on the severity of our anger and our subsequent actions.

But for the moment let's keep anger within the confines of ourselves.

It serves no purpose.

Anger is not a feeling hope for, search out - in some cases we do - or wake up in the morning wishing to be angry at some point during our day.

Rather, anger comes upon us.  It "happens" or someone "makes" us angry.  And more and more these days, there are more and more ways we "become" angry.

"Don't make me angry," pre-Hulk would say.  "You won't like me when I'm angry."

Take a quick look around at the bookstore - there are rows and rows of books on how to "beat" stress and "anger."  Why is that?  With all these books shouldn't we be making progress?  Shouldn't there be less books?

Why haven't we figured out how NOT to be angry?

Perhaps because we aren't looking at the right cause of our anger: ourselves.

Of course, a book that blames US for OUR problems might not be a best seller - even if we know it's true, we don't want to hear it.

But it IS true.  Whether we like it our not, we are the cause of most of our problems in life and the anger that follows.

Think of the last time you were angry at someone - most likely they didn't something (big or small) that YOU didn't want/like them to do.

Have you ever gotten angry at someone for ALL WAYS doing what you want them to?  Though I could see how that might be annoying - however that just proves my point as well.

Anger, for us, all ways involves OUR expectations of someone or a situation.  When it doesn't go the way WE want, we chose to get angry.

That's right, we CHOSE to be angry.

Think back to that last time you were angry at someone.  You chose to be angry at them, because you could have NOT been angry at them.  But that's not how you wanted to feel.  You wanted TO BE angry - as if your anger was some form of punishment.  You wanted them to know you were angry.  Why?

Is our anger at someone THAT MUCH of a punishment?


Clearly not as evident by people who know us still "make" us angry...Our wrath is not so fearful.

But why else do we, should we, get angry?  For what purpose might anger serve?  Be useful for? Can it be the "gift" Rage Against the Machine says it is?

What things are good to be angry at?  Is there people that DO deserve our anger?

Injustice?

Sure, I suppose.  But are we angry at the perpetrators of "injustice" or the act itself?  For if we are angry AT the perpetrators, are we not just being selfish again - they aren't measuring up to our expectations of them.

Can we be angry at "something" like injustice?  How do we know when we see it?  When it makes us angry?

Are people ever helped by anger?

Have you ever been thanked for your anger?

Do we fill books with quotes of anger because they are so valuable?

Should we honor anger?

What good can anger bring to the world?

Or maybe anger is not what it seems. There's a feeling, for sure, that things in the world AREN'T the way they are SUPPOSED to be.  We all feel it.  But we can't put our finger on it.  We can't even fully express it.  Anger then becomes a substitute.

I believe that while we say anger pushes us to action - it doesn't.

Does it push us to protest or to protect?

To screaming or soothing?

To hurting back or helping more?

Sparking riots or building communities?

What purpose does anger serve?

I'm not sure I know anymore...if I ever did.